Manifest: Not So Young, But Still Restless

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Manifest: to make evident or certain by showing or displaying. To be evidence of. To prove. To become apparent.

I have to admit. The term young and restless has always applied to my life. Currently, it still does. I don’t have the itch to change what I am doing with my career. I just landed a great position that allows me to use my public health knowledge and apply it to assisting patients with their health needs. Eventually, I will move up in the company. It’s all apart of my one year plan. My restlessness seems to have another source these days. There is a rumbling just beneath the surface that seems to have me in its grasp. The questions I contemplate over are running through my mind and preventing me from sleeping at night. Am I doing the right thing with my life? Am I in the right place? What is my true purpose? Am I living up to my full potential?

There are people that would tell me I'm blessed, educated, successful, and in a position that many people would envy.  I am and always will be forever grateful for the life that I have but, I can’t help but feel like I am not doing enough. I am constantly on the search for more. To be able to reach more people with life's story; my talent; my wisdom; my encouragement; my personality; myself.  How can I be a bigger blessing to others? To give them the strength to continue to run in this race called life. My dreams are so big, you wouldn't believe them if I told you. My spirit won't rest until I make it to the top and bring a few people with me.  I want to win so bad. Not just for myself, but for all the little girls out there who have the desire to be great, but continue to doubt the greatness they possess.

Will I ever reach a level of success that satisfies me fully?  Will I ever not have this urgency inside to do more? To keep going? To reach an even higher level than I already have? Will I ever feel like enough is enough? I'm not sure. What I do know is, I won't stop until every last one of these questions is answered and I don't have to wonder anymore. It’s my time to manifest.

TT

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Tanasia Thomas